About Synchronicities and Patterns

I am still trying to decipher the logic of patterns in my life, and in conjunction, how to interpret the synchronicities flying before my eyes. At the present moment I am obsessing over why 19 out of 20 times that I am walking to work the light to cross to the other side of Columbus Avenue, where I eventually have to go to, is simply not green.
Due to that impertinent light I am forced to walk straight up for another block, which, FINE, it’s still OK and it’s still on my way, but it bothers me, why, WHY can’t I just cross first and then walk that other block?
So I decided to carefully observe every single thing on that side of the block. Oh my God, I was just completely blown away by so many things that there were in that 264 x 1056 square block! Maybe I was meant to trip on a one million dollar check!
Thus I spent a couple of days scanning the ground in search for my fortunate treasure. I gave up on it when I started tripping too much on absolutely nothing, because obviously I’m not used to walking like some sort of famished dog sniffing every bit of the ground in hope to find some leftovers.
Then I thought maybe I was meant to find my soul mate! Yeah… so I embodied the seductress huntress persona and threw as many fatale gazes as I could into every person’s eyes (well, not really every person… oddly enough they seemed to range between age 24 and 30 and be either tall, blond with blue or green eyes or medium-height black-haired sexy, hot, beautiful women. But that’s just a coincidence!).
Some smiled back, some were highly disturbed by my look. I don’t blame them, I mean, I was staring at them like when you’re expecting someone to tell you something you know? “So… what’s up…? [looooong pause] Are you gonna reveal yourself as my soul mate now or what?”.
Anyways, back to all this being just a coincidence, the question that pops up to my head is whether everything happens for a reason or if there are some things that just happen. If there are things that just happen randomly then I surely believe in coincidences, which I am sure I don’t. I know it’s not in my power to explain everything and find all these why’s, but random? I don’t buy it.
Having this issue solved, let’s talk about synchronicities. For instance, my subconscious screamed “hot, tall, blonde, medium-height, black-haired, beautiful, foxy ladies, pleeeeaseeeee!” therefore alluring the energies that read those characteristics to my welcoming lap.
It would be possible though to perhaps have ran into a fat, bald, old lady whose energy really felt and believed that it contained the points I sought, as well as it would be possible that a strikingly beautiful woman passed by me unknown, for maybe she was deeply feeling unsexy and unwanted.
Well, still to this day I have not yet found my soul mate. So I tried thousands of other different approaches in order to find anything meaningful enough to explain to me why the universe prevented me from crossing. Maybe I’d die if crossed! That sounded like a logical explanation. I have always envisioned myself dying in a car and I was definitely not ready to die, so yeah… it made sense… sort of.
It still remains a mystery to me this particular pattern of non-crossing, but I have not yet given up trying to understand where the synchronicities are taking me. It is fascinating and exciting.
The reason why I don’t stop trying to analyze them is because I refuse the idea of fatalism. Being said so, I believe I contribute in part to the control on how things unfold in my life. It is up to the universe, true, but it is also up to me.
Sometimes, aren’t you in a situation where you really, really wanted something and then the very opposite just happened? And years later you look back and you’re like “fuck yeah, thank God I didn’t hook up with that crazy dude. He’s in jail now for murder” or something? Believe me, NOT a coincidence.
And how about when you finally find someone incredible, and awesome and you both decide to be into a relationship and then bang! Bang!: all these hot ladies come flying at you, calling you, all of a sudden! Telling you how much they want to “hang out” and shit… So intriguing… yes, but this is story for another chapter.